KYYAAAA JUSTIN BIEBER~~~ !!!

ROFL sif
i'm not gonna blog about him i just thought that it was funny.
but really, what is it with girls nowadays.

anyway. uhhmm
so.
everyday when i walk home from uni i walk past the graveyard. and i notice that some homeless people sleep on the benches in the graveyard. and i was thinking what if they've passed onto "the other world" without noticing and that those are just ghost lingering around the graveyard *shudder*
sometimes, they ask passerbys for money.
 i wonder if it's cause they have to pay the ferryman Charon to get across the river Styx.
because. they dont want to wander the shores for a hundred years.
> <"
lol. i think too much..

/Rage Quit Life

oh wait. Kendra has stolen all the 'Q's. damn.
haha.
to be honest, i cbf rage quitting life.
i just cbf life.

speaking of which, both rach and kendra have recently dreamt of my death.
that's a good omen if i ever saw one.
rofl~

yea. so i was acting really crazy today.  like one minute hysterically laughing and one minute banging my head on the table. lol it was funny though at one point, people thought i was crying hysterically. it kinda was funny. but not. i also drew death related things on alex's coursebook <3
 i dont know was wrong with me. sigh. i didnt even have any coffee.
i dont like mood swings. they scare me.

SO. assignment time. or not. i wodner if i can find inspiration at the bottom of a wine bottle. rofl. i'm just kidding, i'm not an alcoholic.

ok so this entry was meant for yesterday. and i really didnt get around to publishing it. lol. So uh. i wanted to finish it today. and before i logged on and started typing, i totally knew what i was gonna say. but now.
/fail.

i shall leave with the resolve to do my assignment.

and i'll write anlther entry later tonight if i remember what i wanted to say.

lol i'm not obsessed with food...... T^T

Uni has started once more, my mother is in nz once more and i have resolved to study harder from now on...
hmm...
blah blah.

ok. so small things amuse small minds. but. ZOMG LOOK AT THIS PIECE OF SUSHI

It's super salmon sushi. ROFL. Kendra and I were so excited by it.
I showed Mac (all enthusiastically) and he was like "oh wow, you're so immature" or something along those lines. meh. typical Mac response i suppose.

Another picture of food:

BLT Bagels at Cima <3 i love that cafe
oh and those are Rachel's fingers on the left of the photo. She's a stealthy one.
lol.
i dont know why i bothered to take a photo of my food really...
but it was pretty =D

speaking of photos of food.
i made chocolate chip cookies today!!
TT"" but they're ugly. so. i'm not putting a photo up... they taste... ok i suppose.
i have to keep working on my baking! making a cake next week. or the week after.

lol~ all i do lately is make food, talk about food and eat food.
like. CONSTANTLY. like. WTH. like. I'M ALWAYS FREAKING HUNGRY.
TT""
it reminds me of a conversation i had with someone once:
"What you up to?"
"Binge Eating"
"OH that's always so attractive in a girl"
"SCREW YOU"
of course, i'm far too much of a wuss to actually have said the last bit. i think i just said "lol" and went back to my binge eating.  which is kind of like what i've been doing lately.
i'm going to weigh 500 million gazillion kgs soon.
don't disown me ok guys?

i shall leave with a photo of epic asian-ness

ROFL.
SEE! I CAN CAMWHORE LIKE AN ASIAN. I KNOW HOW TO DO THE PEACE SIGN AND LOOK DIRECTLY AT THE CAMERA!
(despite what my normal photos look like)



i look like a freak O_o
i hate this photo.
it pains me.
but i had to prove a point.
or several or like. two.
-i dont always look away from the camera
-i dont always look depressed
etc.

"All he has to say is "hey babe, i have a Harley" and i'll take my clothes off"

motorbikes are sexy <3
I want one. omg.

2009 Softail Deluxe in deep turquoise/antique white with steel laced wheels
TT"" it's....so....beautiful.....
ONE DAY. i'll own one.

ahhh.
a day spent with friends doing nothing but chatting/gossiping/bitching over coffee and subsequently, cocktails. it was so great. =]

And i don't mean to be all sentimental but i really love my friends lots.
like A LOT.
like INTENSELY.
lol.
but in all seriousness. all my friends have been so lovely to me. putting up with my depressed-ness. staying up late with me, listened to me bitch, talk about the same things over and over, being on my side, hugged me, hung out with me, made me laugh and just... spent time with me or spent time on me.

When i was younger i used to be really insecure about my friends... like. i worried i'd never find really good friends. I never felt really close to anyone. like. at some points i felt so alone... I was always scared they didnt see me as good friends... and some of them didn't.. even though i saw them as my close friends. lol no, i'm not going to start some sob story. lol.
but now. i have amazing friends. that i know truly care about me and will never ever leave me.
i wont let them >=)
lol~~
but yea, sometimes when i'm with my friends now i'm just SO happy. and i'm really truly so thankful that i found them.
and yea...
sigh.
/end sentiment.
rofl~
but yea. i love you guysssssss <3
like really.
like i REALLY REALLY love you.
*backs slowly away.. *

All i seem to do is post pictures of food nowadays...

ok. so.. thursday night, everyone was at foam party.
well not everyone. it seems that lots of people actually bailed?
meh. idk.
but yea. while everyone was getting ready to go to foam party, i was baking brownies xD
because yea, i'm cool like that...
anyway, behold my work:

ok so it doesnt look great, but it's actually the most successful tasting brownie i have ever cooked.
lol. and yes it isn't square, leave me alone TT""
my brownies are shaped like slices of cake... cause i dont have a square tin..

so yea. that's it... lol (and freaking hell why wont the picture rotate...!!)

and. YESTERDAY.
the long awaited blueberry pancakes. rofl nathan and i worked out a system of counting to 35 before we flipped each pancake.

but. they've finally been made and sarah will stop bugging me about them now xp
sarah kept saying we didnt need baking powder =="" WTH !! i've never made pancakes WITHOUT baking powder. lol.

i think jaever went a LITTLE overboard with the icing sugar, but it was awesome.
i will never eat pancakes without icing sugar again.

oh... and.. ><"" my domokun cake still hasnt been made... /fail..
i havent had time to go and buy red food colouring yet.
so i dont think i'm going to make it anytime soon...
maybe in a few weeks...
faaarrrr i have to STOP eating sweet stuff..
which reminds me. i have ice cream in the freezer..
should i eat it?

HAHA i just published this and i noticed there wasn't a title. i love this~ i dont need a title! it used to make me so mad when i was feeling uncreative.
yes, small things amuse small minds.

Isn't it funny how one small thing can just completely alter your mood?
actually, it really isn't funny...

The sky was SO beautiful when i walked home today... blue, fading into purples and pinks and the sun, which was disappearing behind the buildings was this gorgeous orange. i couldn't help staring at it. even though lat time i checked, it's bad to stare into the sun =P sighhh. i can never describe images and colours like that. i wish i had had a camera with me... my phone camera is broken... ><""
i'm so upset about not capturing that moment. Cause, you know... i have an obsession with taking photos of the sky... ^^;;

I was thinking about the futility of my blog...
I mean, people have food blogs, travel blogs, fashion blogs, makeup blogs....
and i have a italkabouteverythingandalsonothing blog.
/fail.
maybe i should think of a theme...
hmm... maybe next time. haha.
i'm thinking of blogging more. like everyday.

i thought i'd make it more intersting by putting pictures in my blog. and it was. well. i thought so anyway. haha. but i dont even have a good picture today.
=(

the end.
cool story aye.

"oh yea, i hate them stalker baked goods"

And so it is april.
and ahahahaha lecturers are so hilarious they thought it was so hilarious to say "oh and by the way your assignments are due soon" on thurday (april fools). Thanks guys. that one totally hasnt been used before.
= =""

on the other hand.. HOLIDAYS. omg<3
not that think i deserve a holiday... i didnt work nearly enough this half semester.
but nevertheless.
now i have time to clean up my life.
and by that i mean my house.
but yea, in all seriousness, time to get my act together.
tomorrow. or the day after. xp

I MADE CUPCAKES =D

before icing:

after icing:

lol i admit, i'm a terrible cook/baker... anything in the kitchen really.
haha yes bring on the woman/kitchen jokes.
TT everyone was so lovely to me. they were like "no, no the cupcakes weren't salty" which made me smile. although i know they were... damn salted butter.
>=(

And yes, sarah and I are so cool.
while the majority of people were outside drinking/smoking, doing whatever they were doing... we were baking cookies.
and then. it just turned out to be this one big cookie. cause they suck and were like "OMG GIANT COOKIE" sigghh
so it turned out like this:

it was fun though. and it didnt taste too terrible.
^^

uhhhh
it was either this entry or an emo entry.
desserts first, emo, next time.

OH and ryan said i was supposed to say he's cool on my blog. sif he's gonna read it anyway.

filler

After my hardout wannabe pro last entry.... time for a rambling random filler one:

TT my phone is dying....
sighhh....
it has pretty much lost the main function a phone should have...CALLING
In calls... i can't hear people but they can hear me.
sigghhh how fail..
I suppose now i have enough incentive to get a new one. i kinda HAVE been looking around the net for a new phone. but only for research purposes... i wanted to save up money and buy a new and pro one. i currently have no money
/fail.
what to do.. what  to do.. i dont want my parents to buy me one. I wanna be independent!! haha ^^:;
sigghhh japanese people are so lucky, they get the pro-est awesome-est phones. so jealous TT
i want one!! they have such pretty clamshell/flip phones <3

SHARP WX-T923. I wanttttt~~ I think i can get this one in taiwan... but.. they only have it in black TT !!

Woooo mid sem break next week~~~
the prospect of going camping... is exciting ^^;;
hope the weather doesnt freak out on us. and i hope we acutally go through with the idea.
on the other hand
assignments due this week TT

ARGGHH my house is messy TT and there's no food at my house..
i fail at "keeping house". lol
This is a picture of my desk:

ahh so embarrassing~~ ><"

to be fair, i havent been using my desk at all. well. that's not really any justtification. people will think "of course you cant use your desk if it looks like that"

another thing.
i feel like baking...
cupcakes <3 and making icing will be fun too ^^
cookies<3
hahahah can't wait~ i'm excited =D

oh and. the weather angers me lately >=( it's so blah..
one minute of sunshine, next minute rain, but not even hardout rain just annoying light showers. and then wind. and overcast gloom. and then as if it's tauting us, sun again. and then gloom again.

my hair's growing long TT it's gonna lose the shape soon D=
example:

I also look so incredibly horrible and out of it in the photo. i'm sorry the world has to see this. wth is my face doing.... sighhhhh i took this just now, actually. cause i really wanted an example of my fail hair.

lol why am i explaining. not much can fix my face.

that's why i dont wear make up. it wont fix ANYTHING.

no, i am not fishing for compliments.

I feel i always have to make this clear.

earth hour last night. no, i didnt do it.. ><"" i fail. lol. i did it last year just to play with candles tbh... ^^;;

another thing: OMG I CANT FIND MY IPOD I'M GOING TO HAVE A MENTAL BREAKDOWN.

I shall leave with words of complete and absolute wisdom but also of absolute irrelevance to the above entry:

Alcohol is evil.

關於過去的事就藏心底

=O entry title in asian !! lol.

"hide the things from the past in the bottom of your heart"
回到過去 <3 one of my favourite songs in the world
it's filled with meaningful lyrics.. in my opinion anyway.
anyway
that line kind of speaks to me.
It's like... you have to accept things, and move on. You wont forget it, you'll still think of it. But you 're not keeping it constantly on the surface of your consciousness or in your thoughts. Which... makes things a little less unbearable. And i suppose if you keep it at the bottom of your heart, it's like holding something - a memory maybe - dear. It's close to you, it's precious.

"you're still a part of everything i do, you're on my heart just like tattoo"
i like that song also (Jordin Sparks - tattoo)
Just because you get over something (or someone) doesnt mean they havent affect your life in some way. They have. They've changed you. Becasue you've learnt from them, understood the world a little more, understood yourself a little more.

我知道放開手但不知到怎麼忘掉
"I know i have to let go but I dont know how to forget"
song by 五月天 (<3 !!! )  called 而我知道
this line can be translated a little differently but my translation is kind of how i see the line..
I dont know how to forget, but I know that everything eventually fades as time passes. And I know that you have to trust your own judgement. When you know that you have to let go, you should. Forgetting takes time. But it's not impossible. Time changes things? Maybe. But i think you have to allow it to change allow yourself, your emotions, your mood to change.

快樂是選擇
"happiness is a choice"
開始懂了 by 孫燕姿
You make the choice of whether you want to be happy or not. I know that sometimes things just get you down. It happens to me. always. But (I'm not gonna say "ohh you gotta get back up") I think people are allowed to feel unhappy, to bitch to complain. It's just.... you can either choose to continue being down or you can cheer yourself up with things you know will make you happy. For example, i'm happy when i spend time with friends, forget about what bothers me, laugh with them, talk animatedly with them. If i want to make myself happy, i do these things. That's what i mean about choosing to be happy. You cant stop things from getting you down and you cant stop yourself from sad. But you can choose to feel sorry for yourself or you can choose to cheer yourself up, make yourself happy. I know that sometimes that can seem superficial and you'll still feel sad when you're alone... but it's not this way. if you choose to move on, you will eventually be able to.

可是我有時候寧願選擇留戀不放手
"but sometimes I would rather choose to hold on  and not let go"
紅豆 by 方大同 (originally by 王菲) again, not the best translation.
I know people often feel this way. I often feel this way. but life moves forward. and times moves forward. I like staying the the past, i find it hard to let go. haha.. and i like this line because it pretty much is my philosophy most of the time.. HOWEVER.

有沒有那麼一種永遠 永遠不改變
"is there some kind of forever that will never change"
如煙 by 五月天
the answer to that question is no. unless you want to live in a fantasy world of memory. Things will never stay the same. so I know i cant choose to hold on and never let go. I have to let go.
But even so
未來依舊有你的回憶
"In the future i'll still alwyas have a memory of you"
from 回到過去 again. lol.

NOTES:
"you" is used as a general term. lol.
my translating skills are fail.

meh i'm not very meaningful.
holy shit i havent written anything this long in awhile.

mindless, structureless (?) blah entry

Music distracts me nowadays. It doesn't help me think anymore. It just... uh... makes things go blah in my mind. And although blog entries arent anything difficult to write, i had to turn off my music just now.
Maybe it's cause the music i listen to nowadays is mostly slightly depressing and has some sort of resonance in my life and therefore it'll keep making me think of... stuff...
why do i choose to make myself feel this way?
meh i'm a stupid teenage girl, that's why.

I just deleted a whole paragraph because it can pretty much be summed up with the next two lines:
-bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch about my life-
and
"OH WOE IS ME"

I've waited and waited for tomorrow to be a better day.
If you ask me, it's like procrastinating - "i'll do it tomorrow" and then "i'll do it tomorrow"
I don't do it until i have to. which is a long time after.
just like a better day.
it probably wont come for awhile.

hmm i just looked at that. and realized the potential of a poem there. but. meh. i'll see if soemthing comes to me. I've lost the person who inspires me, spurs me, tells me to write poetry.
so how do i continue?